Mid-Life Crisis

Well, actually, it's not truly a crisis, but a time to pause and consider life as it is right now.

No, I don't need a red convertible or a pool boy to ogle at home (I don't even have a pool). I am quite content with my Beetle and The Husband, thank you.

I have, however, been pondering my situation on Planet Earth for a while now. When The Husband and I started our lives together, we had little money and lousy jobs. Our first apartment had a very noisy furnace and the second apartment had very noisy neighbors, but we kept going... somehow knowing that things would "get better". We would have our own house someday -- we would have dependable cars someday -- we would have respectable jobs that paid respectable salaries someday.

Well, the days where I would go to a mall and think about how nice it would be to be able to freely actually buy stuff came and went... and before long I would go to a mall and simply purchase what I wanted.

The first house was nice. The first late-model used cars were nice. The first new car was even better. The second house is great. The second and third new cars are cool. Buying stuff when I wanted to was fun.

This was great... for a while. Then I realized that more "stuff" did not translate into anything other than more "stuff". (Hardly an original realization, I know.)

Now I no longer enjoy accumulating stuff, but I must admit that I do like the security that our present position allows. However, how much of my soul have I sold to get here? Do I really want to spend the rest of my days as a corporate drone just for a little security?

What to do?

Move off the grid completely? Pull a Jeremiah Johnson and leave society and all its trappings?

Please. While I have contemplated a more simple life, going completely off into the wilderness would not be a good idea (I know myself too well). It's a little extreme, don't you think? Even The Husband wouldn't want to completely abandon civilization.

I am still wrestling with this (and have been for a year or so now). But then, isn't life full of opportunities to review our existance and consider alternatives?

The issue is that I am needing to do something more to find my direction now. One option is to stay on my current path, go to work at the Really Big Bank, and enjoy the benefits. Another option is to change the path, but how? What direction? What sacrifices will need to be made to find a new situation? Will it be worth it?

Any ideas out there? Anyone?